Stumbling thru life w/Grace

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Random Thinking

Today I have been all over, blog reading. There are so many different types of blogs, and so many blogs, it's mind boggling. And just the small number of blogs I have read to date, vary from specialized topics, to story telling, to "on the job insights" to day to day life. And more still on just the random inner thoughts of people. To almost a confessional, somewhere that different bloggers are dumping their "dirty laundry". Blogs on the lives or prostitutes/call girls, addicts, recovering addicts, sex blogs, religous blogs, mommy blogs, political blogs, psychological blogs, students of philosophy, you get the picture. And I am sure most are already aware of it. My question/thought is, did most who started a blog, did they have a plan for it? Do they know what they wanted to put into writing? Was there a game plan? Did it just evolve, when they sat down at the computer? Is each post plotted out, technically put together?

A small part of why I was wondering these things, came when a very popular blogger (whom I have voted for on a bloggers award thingy by the way, she is really that GREAT!) left a note in another blog, that I read daily (whom I always enjoy reading as well) about the # of times she posts now, and used to; and why she wrote. Or more to the point WHO she wrote for. Herself, or her wide array of readers. I guess that would be part of my question as well. She answered these questions for herself, and has acted on it accordingly.

WHY, am I here? Am I doing it to gain readers? Am I doing it for myself? And what was so fascinating about this whole blogging experience? And it is fascinating to me. Not just writing one of my own, but reading others. And if truth be told, I spend much more time reading others, then I spending writing this one. ( LOL. I know, it probably shows too)

Admittedly, I have spent much more time then I normally would, or probably will in the future. I fell into this, approximately around the same time I started dealing with back problems that pretty much had me housebound. So my normal schedule was put on hold ( the slack being picked up by both my present husband, and my Ex-husband) The Ex taking over with all the kid errands and chauffeuring, and my husband taking over inside the house, cooking,laundry, etc. This left me time to just try and heal at home...and explore this whole blogging phenomena.(Which means I am probably over thinking this whole thing)

But since I have started one, and I still don't know what I want to do with it......I haven't filled out the part of the first page that most put a small paragraph giving a brief description of what it is, and where it's going....I haven't filled it out, because I didn't know. And I still don't think my ramdom thoughts are going to come to some conclusion now. I have put probably way more thought into it then I should. (But I have definitely had the time)

I have thought, well a journal is good, like a diary. Somewhere to just organize my life in words, and I guess go over it. Or do I want to try and write entertaining stories based on my experiences. (this would be a real stretch for me) How about a dumping ground from my speckled past? And do I really want to put it in words, that it could possibly even remotely come back to haunt me. (I do have 3 kids ranging in age from 9 to 20. And parents, whom I defintely would not want to know the gory details of the past) The only thing I DID know, was that I didn't want it to be a mommy blog. I love my children, and the biggest part of my life, is that of mommy. The way I saw it, it wouldn't be for me anymore then. (Not that I have anything against mommy blogs, I have two such blogs I read daily and enjoy)

So that is the dilemma, I am wrestling with, and why I haven't come to fill in a description. I don't have one yet. I thought it would just evolve naturally, and maybe it is, and I'm not seeing it. But I don't think so. My posts kinda bounce around. From stories, to quotes, to like here, thoughts. I did think, or maybe tried to justify the amount of time I have spent here, that it could improve my writing skills, I could learn more about how to navigate around on this computer, and the technical side of weblogs. Pasting different things in. I did order and get the CD-ROM learning blogger (with Molly E. Holzschlag, her website, ) which I plan on spending time looking at and learning this week-end with the guidance of my husband. So I had this whole positive practical side to the reasoning of why I should blog.

But if truth be told, that isn't the motivator, for why I click on to my favortie blog sites, and continually explore more. I don't know if you would call it voyeurism in the sense of looking in to so many different people's lives. A desire for some sense of deeper connections? (Then the everyday small talk we make in our lives) Or is it just as simple as I enjoy reading. Which I do.....
You end up getting to know these people you have never met, and who don't know you exist. Oh well, eventually I'll figure out my motivation....

So now, what I would like, is those few who did read my site, if you could comment on some of my questions. (ie; did you have a plan when you started your site? Did it just evolve? WHY did you start blogging?)

And for my homegirls Shelly, Lori, Jenny, Vickie, and Jackie.....what way would you explain my type of posts? And which way do you think I should take the site? Just curious....and confused (as usual, lol)

I would also take this opportunity to thank Jenny and Jackie for your get well mails, and your prayers, and just your support when I was really down this last week. I love you both!And Lori and Shelly, I would love to hear from you (catch me up on the latest; gossip and what you're up to) This housebound crap is gettin' old! Lunch next week??? Send me a mail, if you don't want to comment "online" ;-)

Today's P - T - Q from

Prayer : Lord help us keep our thoughts and actions focused on You for guidance to do what needs to be done. Amen

Thought : Mediocrity can talk, but it is for genius to observe. Benjamin Disraeli (British Prime Minister 1804-1881)

Quip : Some folks get a kick out of life, and others only do the kicking.


  • Well, for me blogging is an extension of my journaling. I still journal, just not as often. My blog changes daily. It grows, with twists and turns. I never know exaclty what I will say or how personal I will get. I did open up a little while back, although no one commented on my little post. So maybe I was too personal? Who knows? I think you just have to find your way, write for yourself. I have enjoyed getting to know you.

    By Blogger Brat, at 5:20 PM  

  • Thank you D, for sharing with me. I appreciate it. And what you said, about opening up, and no one commenting, I would probably think it has more to do with people not knowing what to say, in the face of your more intimate sharing. I know that I want to feel free to share what I feel, or allow myself the vulnerability to be honest in things that most likely I wouldn't say,possibly to anyone in person. At least I think that is where I want to go. And part of me is trying to decide, if I write for me, or those that I know may be reading me. I don't think I want to get wrapped up in the popularity of the blogging system.(Not that there is anything wrong with that) Then it is no longer for me. So my suggestion to you, (if I may?) is keep writing what you feel, or if you feel like writing on a more personal note, do. I know I have enjoyed your blog, because I do feel like I have gotten to know you. Your readers who read you regularly, will become more comfortable with personal posts, and respond, the more you share. (And I guess I should take my own advice) I am probably getting too caught up in trying to define my blog, which if I let it, would eventually take away the fun in it. So to try and sum up what you have said, and please correct me if I am wrong, would you consider your blog, "freestyle" and "spontaneous". I am thinking I would naturally lean that way, and enjoy it just for myself, to continue in the manner I am going. And define it as just that, freestyle and spontaneous. I read your blog, and in a general way, I see similarities in our writing, in the sense of each post having its own characteristics. Could be why, I have very much enjoyed getting to know you:-) (And forgive me if I over analyze, it's part of my upbringing, and now just a part of my nature;-)
    Thanks again for sharing with me.

    By Blogger 3rd Times a Charm, at 9:15 PM  

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